Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Dear Costco

Dear Costco,

I love you, but your baggers suck!

You see, I'm smart. I always bring in at least four reusable bags, not because I want to impress you with my mad skills at remembering them, but because I always need that many. Yes, I am amazing at estimating how many bags I'll need when I go shopping.

At first I thought it was the male baggers. I thought that maybe they didn't understand that I have smaller hands and shorter arms than they do. Yes, your cereal boxes are lovely almost-squares. They stack very well, they make excellent boxes for packing gifts. I'm sure if I was two, they'd make excellent imaginary fill-in-the-blanks, but they DO NOT HAVE HANDLES!

I love that your milk has handles. I love that your salsa has handles. I love that your juice has handles. I love that your prices are unbeatable, and that the quality is top notch. I especially love that I can by 100 stamps for less than they cost at the post office. And the food samples. That's fantastic! Who likes to buy new food items with out being sure they'll actually like eating them?

But your baggers, boy, could they use some training.

For instance, tonight, only one of the three boxes of cereal I purchased got bagged. What made that box special? And why not the others, I might add, being that I left the store with two empty reusable bags. I know your bagger saw them because I took them out of the cart and put them on top of the boxes of cereal, and she put them back in the cart.

And while I sort of appreciate that the thingy I bought my sister for Christmas (I'm a planner!) didn't get put in the bag with the cereal, being that she's a celiac and all, a) the cereal is in plastic-lined wax bags in the box, b) she's not going to eat this thingy I bought her, c) this thingy can be washed (which is important considering that Sis is a bit messy...not her fault, I'm pretty sure it's related to how much the stop light gods love her), and d) you had no way of knowing she is from planet Celian to begin with!

So if something does not have handles, please, put it in the F$%@*} bag!

Sincerely yours in shopping,

PS. I can't wait to try out your Pennsylvania Dutch eggnog at Christmas!

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