Monday, January 2, 2012

Virginia's 12-Step Process for World Domination

Or, in other words, my new year resolutions.

Yes, it is that time again. Most of my resolutions this year focus on becoming the kind of person I am in my best imaginary scenarios of myself.  Yes, I am a pretty good person, but I still feel like I spend a lot of time feeling rather disorganized about my life--not in a where-are-my-car-keys? sort of way, but in a what am I doing with myself? sort of way.  I know where my car keys are--in front of the breadbox where they live.  So at least I don't have to add that sort of resolution to my list.

One of the first things I did this year was organize my sock drawer.  I have a lot of socks.  And one of the things I'd like to do is look like the person I'd like to be.  I have a friend from when I worked at Cricket who is always upbeat, positive, has on good clothes, and always has good hair.  I mean, I've seen her in jeans/sneakers/ponytail, but she always looks good. So anyway, the easy step in the process was to organize my sock drawer.  I wear some silly things to the gym.  I mean, really silly.  I have Godzilla running socks.  As in Godzilla, breathing fire and destroying a skyline.  They are silly, but they don't really reflect the image of someone who is put-together. 

Because, if you think about it, the people who look put-together at the gym do not wear Godzilla socks.  And the people who look put-together look more fit, even if they're really not.  And since I carry all of my weight in my tummy, I automatically look less fit than I really am.  Not that I care all that much about the opinions of the other people at the gym, but when I look in the mirror, I don't feel like I look like someone who has their act together.  So I organized my sock drawer. 

Okay, so clearly exercising more and losing weight are on my list of things to do this year, since I felt the need to organize my sock drawer in order to go to the gym.  Everyone tells me I look fine (other than my mother's comments about the photos from Aspen and my sister's observation that my boobs were huge again--but at least this time they're the same size and aren't hanging at my belly button), so I must be wearing the extra weight pretty well, but the scale and my pants dictate otherwise.

I'm sad to say, but I think I'm actually going to have to go down the eat less weight-loss path rather than the exercise more path.  So, I've decided that, at least for the short term, I'm going to be a vegetarian.  When I lived with a vegetarian, I weighed about 15 pounds less than I do right now (I also exercised more and socialized less, so while the algebraic equation of my happiness level may have changed [Happiness=xExercise+yFood+zFriends], I'm still happy with my life, just not my waistline).  So anyway, while I have met chubby vegetarians, it's not common.  And this shouldn't affect Captain America's life too much since we never have dinner together anyway right now, given our work schedules.

Another resolution is to try to work no more than 10-hour work days.  Which would be fantastic because then I'd actually have time to go to the gym.  Also, I'd be less exhausted and crabby.  And finally, my payscale doesn't really warrant me working more than that. 

I also have some financial goals for 2012:
  1. Pay off my credit card. 
  2. Put $5K in the IRA account (this is one of those things that because Obama thinks we're rich, offers us no actual tax advantage, but the conservative-accountant part of me thinks is important anyway.  See, even accountants can behave irrationally when it comes to money).
  3. Pay off one of my student loans.
  4. Have $20K in savings.
I'm also going to embark on using the one minute rule/touch it once rule.  Technically, these are two separate rules, but to me, they go hand-in-hand.  The one minute rule states that if it would take you less than a minute to do, to just go ahead and do it.  Like putting away your running shoes.  The touch it one rule states that you should figure out what to do with something the first time you touch it.  The obvious example is mail: throw away the junk, put the magazines on your bedside table, and pay the bills.  But we all sometimes put the mail someplace else just to deal with it later.

Back to looking like the person I'd like to be, I'm going to actually try to start wearing makeup in 2012.  Or at least wearing it and deciding if I actually hate it or not.  I mean, I own a bunch of makeup because my mother tests products for Lancome and they're always giving her samples, but it doesn't make sense for me to own makeup that I'm never going to use. 

Finally, this wouldn't be a list of Virginia's resolutions without a reading list.  In 2011, according to Goodreads, I read 53 books, up from the 31 Goodreads thinks I read in 2010.  I say it like that because Goodreads doesn't count a book you read in a particular year unless you specifically state the date on which you finished the book.  I don't always remember to do this.  My reading list for 2012 consists of 34 books, some of which I've already read, and some of which I've started but haven't finished:
  • My Reading Life
  • The Promise
  • The Tales of Beedle the Bard
  • World Changing
  • After Roy
  • The Guns of August
  • Breakfast of Champions
  • All the King's Men
  • The Looming Tower
  • Lost in Shangri-La
  • The Summer of my German Soldier
  • Life of Pi
  • The Lincoln Lawyer
  • Feeling Good
  • The Blind Side
  • A Perfect Mess
  • The Complete Chronicles of Narnia
  • The Healing Powers of Chocolate
  • Bound Feet and Western Dress
  • Under the Tuscan Sun
  • Cracking India
  • Fifth Chinese Daughter
  • The Slave Girl
  • Butterfly Burning
  • Cutting for Stone
  • The Help
  • A Clash of Kings
  • A Storm of Swords
  • A Feast for Crows
  • Man's Search for Meaning
  • Les Miserables
  • The Secret Life of Bees
  • The Lovely Bones
  • First Family
There will of course be other books that I read, but this is the preliminary list.  I think I'm going to have a pretty busy 2012.  What resolutions has anyone else made?


  1. Kudos on your resolutions (and your post title!). I'd join you in the vegetarian resolution, but I don't feel like getting a divorce. But seriously, if I shoot for vegetarian lunches, do you think I could get away with it? Shhhh...

  2. Vegetarian lunches are super-easy! Captain America wouldn't be too keen on a vegetarian household, either, so my plan is to slowly make more meals vegetarian/reduce the meat content of meals, and then maybe have the policy that if he wants meat, he can cook it--sort of like your bread policy.